Zeno's Bar & Grill

1. Full of mental distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried

2. earnestly desirous; eager

Tomorrow morning I'm going to do something that I haven't attempted in over seven years - get on a plane by myself. I'm going away for approximately 58 hours, in other words a weekend. On one hand I feel really excited - imagine a plane ride where I can read a book other than The Magic Treehouse. Long, luxurious, breakfasts, lunches, dinners. Sleeping past 6am! No one to worry about except myself!

This is where things dip perilously into the first definition. I'm not as worried about my kids. My husband is very competent and everything on the home front will be perfectly fine. I worried about me. Dying. And please don't offer me the platitude that it is safer to fly in a plane than to drive in a car, because this trip will involve some driving as well.

The thought of my children being motherless is perhaps my greatest fear. Maybe it's because I lost my own mother (twice, in different ways) at such a young age that's done it to me.

Okay, enough of these morbid thoughts. I have a hard time writing about that and this probably is not the proper forum. Besides, I have 24 hours to get through and breakfast to make, so I will focus on the positive and write all about my (hopefully tame) adventures when I return.

--Kelly